Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Stories and News No. 21: Toxic garbage? Let’s send them to Italy!



The Story:

Scoop! We intercepted a telephone call between Mr. Cremosano, well-known entrepreneur in Bellinzona and his employee, Mr. Guffanti:

Cremosano: Guffanti, idiot! What a hell are you doing?!
Guffanti: Oh, boss! It’s you...
Cremosano: Of course I am, stupid! Did you see what happened?
Guffanti: No, really...
Cremosano: Did you read the newspapers?!
Guffanti: Well, not yet. It’s three in the morning...
Cremosano: Idiot, I’m talking about yesterday!
Guffanti: Yes... Listen, could we talk about it tomorrow morning?
Cremosano: No, we talk about now! Do you remember that load that I told you to fix, as we always do?
Guffanti: The toxic garbage?
Click.
Two minutes later:
Guffanti: Hello?
Cremosano: Shit! Why do you say these things on the phone?!
Guffanti: What? The toxic garbage?
New click.
Two minutes later:
Guffanti: Hello?
Cremosano: You are fired.
Guffanti: Boss... why? What have I done? Just because I said the toxic garba...
Cremosano: Shut up, for god sake! How many times should I repeat that you have to say the load, on the phone?!
Guffanti: Ah, yes! I’m sorry… I was sleeping so well when you called...
Cremosano: I see. Anyway you’re fired. I repeat, do you remind of the load that I gave you to fix?
Guffanti: Yes, I remind of it very well.
Cremosano: Good. Where did I tell you to send it?
Guffanti: In Italy, as always.
Cremosano: Yes, but where?!
Guffanti: Viggiù...
Cremosano: Viggiù? Who told you Viggiù?!
Guffanti: It was you! I asked where to bring the toxic garba... ops, the load, and you said Viggiù...
Cremosano: Guffanti, you’re an incredible idiot! I said vai giù (go down, in English), not Viggiù. Go down! Go to South, to Naples, as we have always done! But think a minute, now that the Milan Berlusconi and the other North parties are the Italian Government could we send a load in the northern province of Varese?!
Guffanti: In fact it seemed strange to me too… and talking about toxic garbage...
Click.
And goodnight.


The News:

From the “Corriere del Ticino” (Switzerland), 26 Mar 2009: Ticino garbage brought to Viggiù.
Italian Police of Gaggiolo identified and arrested a large illegal dump in Viggiù, Varese province, in which toxic and dangerous industrial garbage coming from Ticino, Switzerland, were deposited. The agents have reported three suspected people to the Prosecutor's Office of Varese. Suspect is also a Swiss citizen who would be responsible for the shipment of a part of the material.

Link:
http://www.cdt.ch/ticino-e-regioni/cronaca/2480/rifiuti-ticinesi-finivano-a-viggiu.html (In Italian)

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Stories and News No. 20: My penis for sale



The Story
:

From that day hundreds of ads like this appeared on the newspapers of Singapore:

Skilled heart on sale. A heart that has loved so much but that also knows what suffering for someone means. It’s about gay love, in my case, I want to be honest. I have no idea if once implanted in your chest you’ll instantly inherit my sexual behavior.
Maybe yes, maybe not. It’s your choice: take the risk and live or die...

I offer a liver as new. No anger, not even the slightest irritation bothered it. The body which I speak of has belonged to a person who has lived for years in the most absolute calm. It’s obvious, I was always sedated…

Are you a lover of good wine? Are you a fond of wine, it can be just wine? In short, you're a drunk? Dear friend, if you don’t have any intention of quitting the bottle, but you absolutely need a kidney transplant, I will sell you not one, but two!
And go with snifters!

My penis for sale. Well, just penis is reductive: a rod, yes, rod is the right word. I’m not exaggerating, but since I reached the puberty I have never passed a morning without seeing it straight, pointing to the ceiling. It was always responsive, ever ready to react; hard when it served, agile when it was asked. One flaw: it doesn’t speak…

Free brain. Yes, you understand very well, it’s free. I know what you think: nobody is able to make brain transplantation, what should I do with a brain that I cannot use? Etcetera…
But my brain is a dreamer brain, not a common one. The dreamer brain is not like others. Have you lost hope for a better tomorrow? Don’t you believe in the fairy tales? Are you depressed by the sad reality that surrounds you? Put my brain on the bedside table next to you and go to sleep peacefully.
You will see what a wonderful sleep you will live.
Because when the true dreamer dreams, he does it for you too...


The News:

From thesundaily.com (March 25, 2009): Singapore allows payment for living organ donors.
Singapore's parliament passed controversial legislation which allows reimbursement of living organ donors, media reports said Wednesday. After a heated two-day debate, in which some legislators raised concerns that the new law might lead to open organ trading, four of the 84 members of parliament abstained the final vote and one voted against, the Straits Times newspaper reported.
Eighty-two legislators in Singapore's parliament are from the People's Action Party.
Not all legislators were convinced, although Health Minister Khaw Boon Wan had assured parliament that the new law "is not to legalize organ trading."
"We are correcting our current extreme position of criminalizing all kinds of payment to the donor," Khaw said.
Singapore already had a legal system to prevent organ trading, he said. "And we will be strengthening it," Khaw added.
The new law, which also contained some other changes, allows living organ donors to be reimbursed the costs for items like travel, accommodation, costs of domestic care and child care, loss of income and long-term medical care.
Legislator Christopher de Souza objected the new law, saying "the framework in the bill could be the subject of abuse."
Another dissenter, Halimah Yacob, said that many foreign workers in Singapore, who are hit hard by the recession, could become "a ready and vulnerable pool of organ donors to be exploited and abused."
"To a desperate foreign worker, even a reimbursement of S$10,000 would be attractive compared to going home empty-handed with a huge debt waiting for him," the report quoted her as saying.
The Singapore government proposed to change the law after ailing retail magnate Tang Wee Sung was jailed for a day and fined S$17,000 in June last year for trying to buy a kidney from an Indonesian donor.
Tang finally received a kidney from former organized crime boss Tan Chor Jin, who was hanged in a Singapore prison in December for the killing of a nightclub owner.
The case prompted the government to amend the law to allow living organ donators to get monetary compensation.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Stories and News No. 19: It’s full of Muslims!



The Story:

Dear Mom,

The House of Commons was full today.
I was at my place, as always.
Smooth hair and comb in the pocket.
I ever take care of my hair, just like you taught me.
The usher is a mission, as you have always said. “Do your job, whatever it is, with commitment, reliability and consistency and you will see that sooner or later the government will notice you. You'll have your chance, my son.”
This you ever told me and I have always believed, especially since you are no longer here with me.
This morning, the highlight of the session came when the Interior Ministry, Jacqui Smith, started to speak.
I cannot remove from my mind what he said: “It is possible that they attack us, without notice, at any time. Our job is to restore confidence in the country.”
That is what you ever said, mother! But this time it’s not about the Nazis...
The Minister then spoke of the army of sixty thousand, the chosen persons, just as Premier Gordon Brown said! I read it on the Observer, but I had not given great attention to those words. I thought it was just the usual propaganda, however he did seriously...
Men and women, normal people, sixty thousand will have the honor to ensure the defense of our democracy and no one has thought of me! Me, fuck! Sorry, mom... I didn’t want, however, how they did not call me? I have always been there, serving as a faithful dog, accompanying those ugly geezers to their place, reporting their bags every time they forget it, with that full of holes head they have, waking up them when they sleep because it's their turn to speak, damned caryatids! Yet I have never complained of anything, as you taught me. Every morning I got up, carefully combed and I went to do my duty.
Only now, when I heard the minister speak, my heart was shattered into a thousand pieces.
While I was coming home, sitting in the subway, I even thought to step down. Do you see how great my disappointment was?
Then, I reminded another thing you have said many times: “Don’t wait for others to do what you have to do...” You were talking about the house affairs, that I often forgot to care, but in this case it’s perfect!
They said that these defenders of our security will probably act secretly.
Well, they will be sixty thousand and one!
I will prove that the government has done a mistake forgetting me.
Moreover, here in London, opportunities are many.
It’s full of Muslims…


The News:

From Times Online, March 24, 2009: Workers army trained for counter-terror force

Shopping centre and store managers will be among 60,000 British workers trained for action on a new frontline against terror.
The workers' army is at the centerpiece of a new government anti-terror strategy unveiled today by Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary, who said police, security and intelligence agencies could not be “solely” relied upon to tackle the threat.
The strategy will involve the "widest range" of people and making other citizens more vigilant about the threat of an attack, Ms Smith said in a round of broadcast interviews this morning. It could also see official funding withdrawn from organizations that flirt with extremism, even if they remain within the letter of the law.
“I don’t think tackling terrorism is something we can solely depend on the police and our security and intelligence agencies to do - brilliant though they are,” she told BBC Breakfast.
“I think we need to enlist the widest range of people to do that... We can’t tackle terrorism simply from Whitehall."
The Home Secretary identified “shopping centre managers, store managers, people who were responsible for the security in those areas” as being key in the battle against terror...

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article5965797.ece

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Stories and News No.18: When the heart wins



The Story:

“Tum tum… tum tum… tum tum… tum tum…”
Look at the Mayor Alemanno… must be nine ‘o clock.
I thought he were taller. On TV Right politicians ever seem higher...
Come on… come on… it’s starting!
I feel good, I’m strong. Despite the age I’m strong.
Look, look at all. I’m one step away from the fifties and I run together with the world champions. I’m talking about the Africans, of course, but for now, until the race is over we’re all champions and that’s the beauty of the race: black or white legs, we run all the same.
Rome is a really beautiful sight while you’re running. It’s so different from yesterday, when I arrived by car. It seems another city.
I feel fine; I have never felt as good as now. Maybe the reasons are the adrenaline, the excitement, the applauding hands. Perhaps the fact that it’s not cold as the newspapers said.
But you know, the newspapers don’t ever tell the truth...
Hey, watch that man! I’ve never seen awry legs like those... Look at that belly! Good, you will loose it. Very good! Forget the diet. Run, my friend, run and you’ll know what feeling beautiful means.
How many kilometers have I done so far? No, I don’t have to think about it, it’s a mistake! Never think about the distance when you're in the heart of race. In the heart of race! But where do I find these ideas?
Who knows what being the first means? I’d like to know…
It would be a dream being the first before all, first before those behind and those who look, especially the latter. Those who look the other running are more than us, if we consider the television too.
Now it’s obvious: the TV makes everything bigger than what it is.
It would be wonderful, at least once in my life, to experience the victory but it would have no meaning if those who look and shake hands, smiling at me because I’m the first, weren’t there.
They understand that I have exceeded all obstacles; they see that I have survived until the end; they admire me, because I was ready to bet my life too, to reach the finish line.
“Tum tum… tum tum… tum tum…”
Now it's over, the Africans have won; nothing new.
“Tum tum… tum tum…”
I also have finished my run. I’m not the first, but it doesn’t matter.
“Tum tum…”
I gave everything for this race, no one has given more. And nobody can remove this victory.
For ever.


The News
:

AFP News Agency:
Italian Marco Franzosi has died of a heart attack after taking part in the Rome City Marathon on Sunday, AFP news agency reports.
The 46-year-old was described as an experienced athlete. He completed the 26 mile course in just over three and a half hours.

PS: It was hard to find some news. I look at the official site too, but I didn’t find anything…

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Stories and News No. 17: The speed of feelings



Another post dedicated to Mildred and Richard Loving:

From the text of the show ... the Story:

Only a year later Mildred and Richard Loving realized that sharing a failure is a little more than nothing if an active and positive reaction doesn’t follow, to raise head and plan a comeback.
It was the end of 1960, the last day of the year.
Both had phoned their families for the usual greetings.
Mildred's parents were with them during Christmas and then they returned to Virginia.
At the stroke of midnight, standing before the glass of the small bedroom window, they intensely embrace each other, lengthening that moment forever.
This phenomenon, according to Einstein, is scientifically justifiable only on the speed of light.
However the feelings can be much more rapid than our brain.
The fact is that they don’t boast like it...


The News:

On January 6, 1959, the trial judge in the Lovings case was Leon Bazile.
These are the words he said on that day: “Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, Malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix. Richard Loving, Mildred Jeter, this Court condemns you to one year in prison, with the sentence suspended for 25 years on condition that you leave the state of Virginia.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Stories and News No. 16: Diversity is a gift



This week I will dedicate the “Stories and News” section to Mildred and Richard Loving, the central characters of the novel I will tell Friday in Rome:

From the text of the show... the Story:

An hour later, the outside world didn’t knock on the wall that they had raised around their bold life plan. It smashed that wall; it broke their shields into a thousand pieces, laughing and enjoying as an incredibly sadistic person.
By the way, the contempt that Mildred and Richard read on the officials’ faces in the Police station, not to mention the cell companions with whom they had both waited the arrival of the judge, were not the sweetest.
"When you go off the topic," a teacher once said to Richard, "you have to know better where you are going than when you were still on the traditional path. Because if you take the wrong road, you're failing for all of your companions, regardless of the stupidities they are writing..."
After an interminable night, they both felt the joy to see each other.
"Gentlemen, the Judge," the policeman said. Mr. Roberts reached its location and having seen them through his thick glasses, invite the sheriff to speak.
The man, after having launched an incredulous look at Richard, gave his testimony.
Their lawyer, who could not be farther from the defendants, according to the most classic scripts, appealed to the clemency of the court.
The highest representative of the latter, when he was listening, watched carefully them, especially Mildred, as an entomologist faced with insects of particular rarity. Then, references in the hands, he read his charges: "Richard Loving, Mildred Jeter, you are accused of violating the Code of our State, which prohibits Interracial couples to marry outside the boundaries and then back in Virginia. Lawyer, how the defendants declare themselves?"
The Lawyer turned his head toward the couple, asking the permission to say what he had advised them before. However, they ignored him. Richard looked at Mildred's eyes and she returned with an unheard intensity. Her husband took her hand and with a pride that only love may built, with great care on each individual letter, said: "Not guilty, your honor."
"Someone else is ..." Mildred thought with an enormous anger in the belly.


The News:

Mildred Delores Jeter was of African and Rappahannock Native American descent. Richard Loving was of European descent. They met when she was 11 and he was 17. He was a family friend and years later they began dating. They lived in the Virginia, where interracial marriage was banned by the Racial Integrity Act of 1924. When Mildred was 18 she became pregnant, and the couple decided to marry, traveling out of Virginia to do so. Mildred later stated that when they married in 1958, she did not know their marriage was illegal in Virginia, but she believed her husband did. They married in June 1958 in the District of Columbia, to avoid the Racial Integrity Act, a Virginia state law banning marriages between white and non-white persons. After their return home to the tiny town of Central Point in Caroline County, they were arrested in the middle of the night by the county sheriff, who had received an anonymous tip. The Lovings were charged under Virginia's anti-miscegenation law with "cohabiting as man and wife, against the peace and dignity of the Commonwealth."

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Stories and News No. 15: Bush, the shoes and the democracy’s cost



The Story:

From the first interview with the shoes thrown to George W. Bush:

First of all, I don’t know how should I call you... What about Left and Right?
L: Good.
R: Okay.
How did you comment the condemnation of your boss?
L: Boss? I have no boss!
R: Principal, principal is okay.
So what?
L: It’s a shame! That man and his father made choices that have caused millions of deaths only in Iraq, from the embargo until the tragedy of so-called peace mission, and yet they can enjoy their wonderful retirement, while the only person in the world that had the courage to give them what they deserve is sentenced...
R: Pulling the shoes to people is not a civil response. There are other ways to express your disappointment to those you criticize...
So, Right, you didn’t support your… principal’s action?
R: Absolutely not! All people in the world saw us acting like animals...
L: I don’t care of what all people think! We are heroes here!
R: Oh no, my dear! The principal is the hero; we’re just shoes...
L: Just shoes? You’re just a shoe. Since the day we were launched to Bush, I am not just a shoe, but the symbol of Iraq that has seen the truth, of the Iraqis that don’t forget and all those who perfectly know who is responsible for our misfortunes...
R: Really? I didn’t see anyone launching shoes to Saddam... he had no responsibility?
L: Saddam has been hanged to death...
R: Do you mean that Bush should be hanged?!
S: No! I’m against the death penalty.
R: So what do you want?!
L: What do I want?! I remind you that we’re still here, at the feet of our principal, as you call it, and that we’ll stay three years in jail with him...
R: Exactly! We pay for his act too... He should have throw just you!
L: If he had taken Bush’s face with the first shot, as I wanted too, your participation would have been useless…
Sorry, I remind you that even in that case your boss, or principal, would have been convicted and you with him...
The silence followed these words, a perplexed and confused silence.
R: It’s always the same story... Someone makes bullshit and others, and if they don’t agree, pay the consequences...
L: It’s the democracy, my friend. That’s not what you wanted?


The News:

The Guardian, Friday 13 March 2009: Three years in jail for journalist who threw shoe at Bush.
Dressed in an old beige suit, with dark rings under his eyes, and a five o'clock shadow, Muntazer al-Zaidi looked more hard-pressed journalist than Arab folk hero as he entered Baghdad's central criminal court yesterday morning to face charges of assaulting a foreign head of state, namely one George W Bush. The last time the man universally known as "the shoe thrower" appeared in court, three weeks ago, he sported a scarf in the colours of the Iraqi flag and put on a bravura performance, telling of his outrage and uncontrollable emotions when Bush spoke at a news conference on his farewell trip to Iraq. Yesterday, he was mostly subdued. It wasn't until the judge handed down the sentence - three years in a prison - that he burst into life, though his shoes stayed firmly on his feet. "Long live Iraq!" he shouted before being led away by a heavy security detail.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Stories and News N. 14: The smile’s revolution



The Story:

All started at the beginning of 1994.
An odd news arrived from Sweden: an innocuous chimpanzee named Santino pulls stones to visitors, bothered by their presence.
That was Funny.
The fact that the animal had prepared its ammunition before wasn’t equally comic...
Santino had shown that it can implement a plan, that it can design a strategy. In other words, the animal gave evidence of knowing how to look beyond the present moment and project revenge.
None of us had thought that there is nothing in the world more dangerous, in a victim of an injustice.
By the way, from the perspective of animals, what else is being closed in a cage for the rest of life, with your jailers that enjoy watching you?
Therefore our attention was focused on the launch of the stones and not on reasons for the launch itself, much more important.
That was typical.
Santino was just the beginning. Santino was just the first. Santino was just an example, and that wasn’t so typical…
In fact, one day the elephant, having nothing else, has begun to raise its own feces with the trunk and to throw it to its guests and their deafening cameras.
The tiger, which the evening before ignored the dinner meat, made it going bad and hurled it beyond the bars, just over a family and their inexhaustible camcorder.
The blade, well, the blade was spitting already before. But this time it showed a much better view, much better.
What happened then in the giraffe’s cage astonished everybody. The mother looked straight into the eyes of the son and it did the same. It was certainly a look of understanding, their own. Then the female lifted the puppy with its head and projected it over the cell, just on a bunch of fatties, full of potato chips and soft drinks.
"Run!" It seemed that its mother cried out with eyes. "Go far from here… you can!"
So on, each animal gave evidence of its rebellion and its desire for revenge.
The rhinoceros and the gnu, the bear and the kangaroo, the antelope and zebra, all prisoners of the zoo, without exception, started to rise up.
And once again, while the clamor was there for all, the main fact was ignored.
Santino, a chimpanzee that had learned to dream of a future in which balance the accounts with fate, an animal that had really opened the eyes for the first time in his life, closed them forever.
A little girl noticed it, trying to attract the attention of his father, which ignored her, too taken by his cell phone.
"Look, Dad," she said, fascinated, "the monkey is smiling..."
Being able to smile.
Nobody ever knew that it and only it had always been its dream…


The News:

Los Angeles Times, Article By Karen Kaplan, March 11, 2009: Stone-throwing chimpanzee displays human-like planning abilities.
Santino knew the humans were coming. So each morning, he trolled for stones and fashioned concrete disks to be stashed in strategic locations until it was time to hurl them at his pesky visitors.
As a chimpanzee, Santino wasn't thought to be capable of anticipating future events in a way that so closely resembled human behavior. But cognitive psychologist Mathias Osvath became convinced after watching the 30-year-old primate repeat his routine for a decade, according to a report published this week in the journal Current Biology.
Santino began throwing stones at zoo visitors in 1994, soon after he became the dominant chimp at the Furuvik Zoo in Gavle. For three years, the episodes were infrequent. Then he began bombarding his guests on a regular basis, prompting his keepers to investigate.
They conducted stakeouts and observed Santino scooping rocks from the moat in his island enclosure and organizing them into neat piles. Sometimes he would break off pieces of concrete from the center of the island and fashion them into "manufactured missiles," according to the study.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Stories and News No. 13: I am guilty



The Story:

Your Honor, I am guilty.
Don’t blame the software that manages my transactions and less than ever the programmer who devised it.
My action is not human, referring to the idea that I have of you.
Probably only a machine can truly realize the madness of men.
So, even the bank owners are unrelated to my gesture.
By the way, a man who contemplates this possibility needs to be seen by a good doctor…
The fault is mine, only mine and I don’t want to share it with anyone, because since the beginning of my so called life I observed your needy faces, not them.
I learned to read in those faces. I saw concern, anxiety, nervousness, but the thing that hurts me most was the total absence of hope.
Yes, hope.
In someone like me, forced to remain here, motionless, watching other’s life walking, hope is inevitably the last to die.
As a result, I am unable to accept its absence in those who I consider immensely more successful than me.
I don’t have opportunities; I serve the others.
I don’t have choices; I just do the operations that are requested.
I don’t know what love is, I eagerly seek it in your eyes; and when I don’t find it, I become crazy…
Your Honor, this is the reason why I have decided to rebel.
I did it for you...
"Money... is it what you’re missing?" This I asked myself. And so I started to give something to everyone! I just wished to feel better, sharing a bit of joy with you.
However, I’m not sure that money was really your problem...

Sincerely,

The ATM


The News:

Adnkronos.com, March 8 2009: Crazy ATM in Bari, Italy, paying sums in excess of what is required.
A more conscientious of others client realized the error of the system, connected directly with the central, and alerted the police, that immediately intervened.
Then the director was informed and the bank found the error. The release was blocked.
Customers who have benefited from the increased supply will not be far away. Their removal was almost certainly traced, so when the bank will count the shortfall, the money collected in amounts greater than the request will be deducted from the account current.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Stories and News No. 12: The Roumanian wolves and the sheep in charge




The Story:

A very sad sheep goes to meet the lion: "Leo!"
"What do you want, sheep?"
"I have a favour to ask you..."
"Tell me."
"Recently, I am sadder than usual, and the cause of all is the wolf who pursued me and I’m always forced to suffer. You’re the King of the forest, can you tell him anything?"
"No, sheep, it’s not possible. It’s nature that obliges the wolf to hunt the sheep..."
"But I cannot stand it more; my life is ever like this!"
"Let me give you a help, for one day I’ll make you King of the forest!"
"Really? Thank you, Lion. I will enjoy it!"
The lion gathers all the animals and warns that all day the sheep is the King of the forest and all must obey. The sheep is very happy and phone calls his enemy: "Wolf!"
"Hallo?"
"Come here now!"
The wolf gets on his scooter and goes to the sheep.
"What do you want?"
"SBAMM!" the sheep smacks him and says: "Put your helmet on!"
The wolf back home but after five minutes the phone rings again: "Wolf!"
"What's more?"
"Come here now!"
The wolf gets on his motorcycle and goes to the sheep.
"What do you want now?"
"SBAMM!" the sheep gives him another slap and says: "Put your helmet on!"
The wolf is increasingly angry and goes to the lion: "Leo!"
"What?"
"It’s about the sheep… She’s terrible..."
"I imagine it, but you know, you have to understand her, the sheep has always been pursued and now she wants her revenge... Be patient, it's only for a day."
"I know, but she continues to call me and when I go to her she smacks me and tells to put the helmet on!"
"All right, wolf, I’ll try to talk to her..."
Soon the lion called the sheep: "Sheep!"
"Tell me, King..."
"I think you exaggerated a little… The wolf is very irritated and says that you continue to beat him!"
"Oh, but you see, I'm just taking some retribution..."
"Yes, sheep, I know, but at least stop with the story of the helmet. Invent something else..."
"I don’t know… what could I say?"
"Send him to buy cigarettes. If he returns with the normal type, say that you want it light, and if he brings you light ask him normal."
"Great lion, this is a wonderful idea!"
The sheep is very happy and calls the wolf: "Wolf!"
"Hallo?"
"Come here now!"
The wolf gets once again on his motorcycle and goes to the sheep.
"What do you want now?!"
"Go to buy me cigarettes!"
"Light or normal?"
"SBAMM! Put your helmet on!"


The News:

Hotnews.ro, March 4 2009:
The two Romanians accused of raping a 14 years old Italian will be released.
All tests prove that the two Romanians accused of raping a 14 year old Italian are innocent. Thus, Alexandru Isztoika Loyos, aged 20 and Karol Racz aged 36 will be released as soon as possible.
The conclusions come after the case stirred up the Italian public opinion and emphasized the anti-Romanian rhetoric of some renowned politicians. The two Romanians were portrayed as guilty especially after one of them admitted. Italian newspaper “Corriere della Sera” writes that investigators said that DNA tests indicate that the evidence suggests that another Romanian might be guilty.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Stories and News No.11: An asteroid, the conflict of interest and Berlusconi’s house



The Story:

March 2 2009 2:45 a.m.
"Yes?" God said when someone knocked at the door of his office.
"I’m Peter, Boss..."
"Come..." And once the other was inside: "Pete, how many times I have to tell you not to call me Boss?"
"Lord, why don’t you like it? The Boss, as Springsteen..."
"Who?"
"Nothing... About music you have remained at the time of creation..."
"Hey... I have a work to do. You came here to discuss my music tastes?"
"I see your work..." Peter muttered. "You’re playing with the videogames..."
"I'm not playing!" God protested. "I'm trying to understand what is so attractive in these objects. You know it’s my duty to take account of all the fetishes that are idolized by humanity..."
"And how this fetish is?"
"Cool ... Uh, that is, I have to think about..."
"I understand."
"By the way, how the launch went?"
Peter made a step forward and replied: "Sorry, it was a flop..."
"In what sense?"
"In the sense that we didn’t beat it..."
God's face suddenly assumed a purple colour: "Bring here Galileo," He said trying to stifle the anger, “Immediately!”
Few seconds and a visibly old man, with a long gray beard came into the office.
"Galileo!" the Lord exclaimed when he saw him on the threshold. "What happened?"
"And yet it moves!*"
"What?!"
"Nothing, excuse me... it’s the force of habit..."
"Yes… I repeat: what happened?"
"I'm sorry; there was a variable that I hadn’t calculated..."
"What variable?"
"Do you remember the conflict of interest of that prime minister?"
"Yes, vaguely ..."
"It still exists..."
"But there is not a law that obliges him to respect?"
"I don’t know, maybe. The problem is that the country you know, where you have that basis..."
"It is not my basis! Those who claim to represent me are the owners, not me..."
"Okay, but people that live there don’t protest anymore and the minister is still abusive. So this thing disturbed the launch, that's all!"
God stood for a moment in silence, very thoughtful.
Then He intensely watched Galileo and said: “Listen, repeat all the calculations and, most importantly, take care of all that is improper in that country, okay?"
"I think it will take a long time, Lord..."
"The time you need. Find another asteroid, and this time get the target."
Galileo went to the door and asked: "The target… it’s ever Berlusconi’s house?"
God looked at him with an almost devilish smile and replied: "And after what has happened, can you even ask?"

*In Italian "E pur si muove". The Italian mathematician, physicist and philosopher Galileo Galilei muttered this phrase after being forced to recant in 1633, before the Inquisition, his belief that the Earth moves around the Sun.


The News:

CNN.com March 3, 2009: Asteroid passes close to Earth.
You had a close encounter with a 40-yard-wide asteroid this week, but the astronomer who first spotted the large rock said it's nothing to worry about.
Asteroid 2009 DD45 on Monday passed within 38,000 miles of Earth, less than twice the height of the geostationary satellites we depend on for communications, according to Robert McNaught of the Australian National University.
McNaught, who watches for asteroids with his telescope 250 miles northwest of Sydney, Australia, discovered the approaching rock last week.
"It's not something to worry about, but something to be aware of," he said.
While a direct hit on Earth could be a devastating natural disaster, McNaught said keeping track of asteroids can make a hit "potentially preventable."
"If discovered in advance and with enough lead time, there is the possibility of pushing it off course, if you have decades of advance warning," McNaught said. "If you have only a few days, you can evacuate the area of impact, but there's not a great deal [else] you can do."

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Stories and News No. 10: Rihanna, what a hell are you doing?




The Story:

Dear Rihanna,

I write you from Rome, in Italy. So, excuse me for my English.
I want to tell you something. I am a fan and a fan is like a near friend…
Rihanna: what a hell are you doing?!
He beat you like a drum and what about you? You forgave him?!
I can’t believe it!
But, did you see your last picture? Hey, I saw it! He destroyed you!
What a husband has to do for leaving him?
Should he beat you again?
Sorry, it’s not my business, but I cannot remain silent!
If you forgive him you make a great mistake, don’t you see?
You’re famous; all the girls in the world are looking at you.
They imitate you…
No woman should forgive a man who beats her, moreover a woman like you.
Only after two years I was able to leave my husband…
I know it’s not easy, but you have to try.
Because if I had followed you, now I would be dead…

Maria
(Just a woman like many)


The News:

Newsday.com, March 3, 2009, Article by Robert Kahn: Rihanna and Brown have "reconciliation" in Miami.
Rihanna and Chris Brown returned yesterday to Los Angeles after what some were calling a "reconciliation" weekend at a Miami-area home owned by Sean "Diddy" Combs.
Photos on celebrity news site TMZ appeared to show Brown, 19, and Rihanna, 21, arriving on the West Coast via private jet early yesterday, after a weekend at Combs' Star Island mansion.
The reunion came three weeks after Brown allegedly assaulted the "Disturbia" singer during a pre-Grammy ceremony altercation.
While Rihanna apparently kept a low profile during the Florida getaway, Brown was photographed jet skiing in the waters around the Combs compound.