Friday, April 30, 2010

80 undeclared checks to Minister Scajola: resignation?

Stories and News No. 162

Every day that passes I am convinced that Italy is truly the most paradoxical country in the world.
Quite simply: aid workers are terrorists and warmongers are heroes, who talk about the Mafia maintain its power and who is enriched thanks to it is its bitterest enemy, who dares to dissent is a traitor and who ever changes his mind is a loyal person.
However, these deceptions come almost always from the same source, a kind of virus that distorts the facts and the truth.
The problem is that there is no antivirus in Italy.
Without antivirus, the infected file is not recognized.
The virus is considered a system program.
Indeed, it’s the system…

The Story:

Once upon a time there was once a kingdom called Paradox.
In the kingdom there was a king that we can call Silvio.
The king had a son that we can call Claudio.
Prince Claudio was not exactly what you call a genius and was in an awkward situation.
The tax collectors, having investigated him, discovered that the castle where his daughter lived had been purchased through a large gift of money by the robber Anemone - which means wind flower - so named for its ability to lighten the pockets of the poor in favor of the rich.
He was a sort of Robin Hood in reverse.
Moreover we are in the kingdom called Paradox.
Prince Claudio decided to resign from his title and went to King Silvio to ask for advice.
"Claudio, you have to go forward," the king said, "because if I accepts your resignation, the kingdom would be weaker: we would give a picture of crumbling now that we are under attack from the Baron Fini…"
Baron Fini, called the dissident, in the past was an ally of the king but he dared to criticize him before the whole court and from that day he was subject to terrible insults.
Even his mother-in-law was not spared.
"They fight you to attack me, you know," King Silvio continued, "but you'll see that in a week everything will deflate; you just hold on until the wave passes..."
"What? The oil spill affecting the new world has come down to our shores?"
"Idiot and idiot me I've given such birth. It's a metaphor..."
However, despite the reassurances, Claudio was disheartened: "I don’t want to participate in a process in the public square, they disgrace me and my family..."
"Don’t tell this to me..." the king thinks.
"You have to defend yourself more hardly," Silvio added, raising his voice, "with a knife between your teeth! You have to show fierce, fearless. Only then you will get out..."
The same night Claudio had a restless sleep, remembering the words of his father.
There was no other way than following his advice.
The next day he came to court with a knife between his teeth, trying to look fierce and fearless in the face.
While all the courtiers watched him admired behind him baron Fini came, and, giving him a friendly but firm pat on the back, greeted him: "Claudio, how are you?"
The prince was caught by surprise and unfortunately swallowed the knife, dying instantly.
Thus the kingdom called paradox had its moral: Claudio at his funeral was celebrated as a hero who died in the performance of his duties, baron Fini was tipped as a murderess and a traitor who attacked from behind and the king lost an idiot son but got another castle…

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Thursday, April 29, 2010

Is Berlusconi Lodo Alfano Constitutional?

Stories and News No. 161

Apparently, the new Lodo Alfano - or the latest attempt to prevent Silvio Berlusconi to be processed - is ready.
Someone talks about a Constitutional Lodo Alfano.
What's constitutional in a decree that states that all citizens are not equal before the law?
In front of these fundamental principles we should see who is really an alternative to the abuses of our Premier…

The Story:

Here’s the real text of the Lodo Alfano Law:

1. The Prime Minister is untouchable.
2. The Prime Minister is always untouchable.
3. In the unlikely case that a judge had the evidence of his guilt, you will apply the Article 1. and 2.
4. The Prime Minister does not corrupt; he offers disinterested gifts.
5. The Prime Minister does not steal; he borrows forever.
6. The Prime Minister does not go with prostitutes; he saves them from the road.
7. The Prime Minister does not quarrel; the others do.
8. The Prime Minister does not lie; he just colors the truth.
9. The Prime Minister has never had relations with the Mafia; he only tries to better know the enemy to fight.
10. The Prime Minister is not familiar with minors, he educates them.
11. Who enters the office of the Prime Minister with his own ideas must come out with those of Prime Minister.
12. The Prime Minister thinks for all.
13. If you think like the Premier, you will have a long career in the Party.
14. The Prime Minister is the Prime Minister even in the toilet.

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Greece crisis and laughs in Italy: here’s why

Stories and News No. 160

Many not Italian newspapers, dealing with the economic crisis in Greece, speak about the danger that Portugal, Spain and especially Italy live, as today Wall Street Journal, which indicates my country at serious risk of infection because it has a debt seven times the Greece one.
However, even since the serious financial Greek situation is on all media, we continue to hear from our government assurances and calls for optimism.
Maybe Berlusconi and C. know something we do not know...

The Story:

Once upon a time there were two peasants, one Greek and one Italian.
The two peasants, who lived side by side, had a field.
Both lived only of their own harvest and both had a wife and children.
One day a terrible drought struck on the two farms.
A field without water is destined to the end.
A peasant with no field doesn’t get a harvest.
And the children of a peasant without harvest have nothing to eat.
Now, you know how humans do.
They are diverse and everyone differently reacts to adversity.
The Greek was desperate, crying with rage and pain under the anxious eyes of his family.
In the same time, the Italian smiled and repeated to his wife and children: "Don’t worry. We will overcome the crisis because we tackled it better than others."
"The others?" The wife replied. "Do you mean the Greek?"
"Woman, don’t be demagogic," he silenced her. "Go back in the kitchen."
The days passed and the situation remained unchanged.
Every morning the Greek peasant left his bed, went out and discouraged swearing in front of the cloudless sky and the merciless sun.
Then he turned toward the near field and saw the Italian in the middle of his field with open arms and a broad smile, serene and exclaiming: "We will overcome the crisis because we tackled it better than others!"
Weeks passed, months too and finally Death arrived.
The black lady with the sharp sickle came down to earth and knocked on the door of the Greek.
He opened and showed no surprise seeing her on the threshold.
"Hello, Death," he said with a resigned tone, "I knew that sooner or later you would come to us. But one thing makes me happy: now my neighbor will stop laughing and boasting..."
Death took a look to the near field and watched for a fleeting moment the Italian peasant who always smiles and with open arms exclaimed: "We will overcome the crisis because we tackled it better than others."
"What neighbor?" The black lady asked.
"What neighbor?" The Greek cried. "The one you will take after me! If I fell in disgrace, let alone him. He has seven children and me just one…"
Death arched his left eyebrow and said: "One thing you're right. After you I will take a woman and seven children from next door; but no peasant."
The Greek was seized with a nervous breakdown, and indicating the Italian shouted: "Death, are you blind? Don’t’ you see him?!"
"What? Ah, you are talking about the scarecrow, with a tape recorder inside. The Italian peasant, the owner of the field, the man who must provide for his family escaped time ago…"

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Nuclear, Berlusconi and Putin in a history of sex

Stories and News No. 159

"Within three years we will start to work on building the first nuclear power plant in Italy."
This is the prediction (threat) made by Prime Minister Berlusconi at the meeting he had with his Russian counterpart, Vladimir Putin.
Italy will have the support of Russia in this important project.
As in a previous post, also today I have the honor of interviewing the famous Italian-American psychotherapist and sexologist Lisa Pointgee.

The Story:

A: Dr. Pointgee, thanks again for the homage of your presence here.
L: You’re ever welcome.
A: First of all I tell you that your last sexual interpretation of the clash between Berlusconi and Italian President of Chamber of Deputies Fini has left me very puzzled...
L: You have not yet heard about the possible nuclear relationship between your Prime Minister and Putin.
A: Nuclear relationship...?
L: Yes, nuclear relationship. I explain immediately: we define as nuclear relationship that particular type of bond established between two helplessly males.
A: Excuse me: are you perhaps suggesting that Silvio Berlusconi and Vladimir Putin are helplessly? I totally disagree. I have a family...
L: Stay calm. First of all I said possible nuclear relationship. Second, I am a scientist, I rely on the facts and the facts tell me this.
A: Please describe those facts.
L: Look carefully at this snapshot of the two men:

L: You can see that Berlusconi and Putin have some common elements that underlie the nuclear relationship.
A: And what would they be?
L: They are low people, really little men; they are peeled, despite false new growth, both powerful and authoritarian. It’s a textbook platitude that short and bald cap men, with sexual impotence, develop an inferiority complex that must somehow compensate for publicly demonstrating personal manhood.
A: It's a classic.
L: Of course, depending on money possibilities, the low male manifests his attempts to compensate in different ways: the gun, the big car, the latest generation cell, the yachts, a great villa and so on.
A: Excuse me, among these there is also the Blog...?
L: No, there are other diseases behind it.
A: ...
L: Anyway, Berlusconi and Putin, being men of extraordinary power and wealth, need to incredibly balance their weak masculinity. Surely, the two subjects have shared their disability and that is where the nuclear relationship started.
A: Sorry, but why nuclear?
L: It's obvious. Watch this second picture:

L: The cooling exhaling steam towers offer metaphors that even a child may understand. My Russian colleague, Professor Eja Kulationov, sees them as two giant fuming testicles, striking proof of virility. How do you males say when you do the boasters? My balls are smoking. Don’t you?
A: Yeah…
L: However, I have other opinions. I think that the towers represent two steaming and boiling disproportionate penis in full erection: the greatest dream of every sexual impotent male, actually two. So we have the nuclear relationship.
A: How does the dreaded crash fit into this metaphor?
L: Well, you must start to worry.
A: Why?
L: Because a hot penis in full erection, if it’s satisfied, sooner or later explodes...

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Monday, April 26, 2010

We are Giovanni Falcone tree

Stories and News No. 158

Saturday afternoon, in total daylight, under the eyes of all, it was made another insult to the memory of Italy.
Someone stole the pictures and messages left on a tree in memory of Giovanni Falcone.
The tree, also dedicated to him, is in Palermo in Via Notarbartolo 23, since eighteen years.
It's a fundamental symbol for our country.
I think that what happened is a fact of unprecedented severity and I feel obliged to write it here, now, just only to remind myself.
Because memory is the most important thing we have...

The Story:

We are the tree of Giovanni Falcone.
We are there, silent witnesses, stooped and motionless to look at life flowing around us.
We are the lady at the window waiting for something she could tell.
We are the man in the car behind the window blocked by the traffic light, fixing his glaring eyes to the reflection in the mirror of the man behind him, congested too by traffic lights also prisoner of a car behind a window, watching the reflection of everyone else.
We are the little old lady in line, patiently waiting with a look flying from her precious ticket and the people who divide her by the goal.

We are Falcone tree.
We are the ones who see, listen, and know.
We are the face in the crowd who regularly stops to admire the death of others, rejoicing in secret not to be the protagonist of the scene.
We are the tourists, the passing presence, and the person on holiday with the inalienable right to distract from himself, let alone others.
We are the nation of the spectators, with an eye to the TV screen and one to the next button on the remote.

We are the memory tree.
We are the citizen that every day does everything to convince him that the bad things happening in Italy always concern the persons in charge.
We are the men who have never entered the building where the persons in charge live.
We are only those that send them there.
But we are also the better part of ourselves when we find the courage to speak, to assassinate our guilty silence and pay tribute to a true hero…

We are the tree which had been stolen of the words of remembrances.
We are that bare, wounded, raped, humiliated, and speechless tree.
There is something worse than erase the memory of a country: to remove the words to remember it…

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.
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Friday, April 23, 2010

Fini and Berlusconi, a history of sex

Stories and News No. 157

Now we have arrived to the psychodrama.
Or the Neapolitan sceneggiata, it depends on your point of view.
Gianfranco Fini and Silvio Berlusconi, the two main leaders of the PdL, clashed yesterday before the cameras as it had never happened before.
The two are now as a separated couple into the house.
I am particularly interested in the psychological components of this dispute and I asked the opinion of the famous Italian-American psychotherapist and sexologist Lisa Pointgee.

The Story:

A: Dr. Pointgee, first of all thank you to do me the honor of being my guest today.
L: You’re welcome.
A: Let’s go now to the theme of this interview. I know that you - being of Italian origin, always follows our facts.
L: Yes, indeed.
A: Have you heard about the clash between Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi and President of the Chamber of Deputies Gianfranco Fini?
L: Sure. I have not lost anything of yesterday public meeting.
A: Really?
L: I even recorded it all, saving it as useful material for my lectures.
A: Why?
L: Believe me. I've never seen an externalized sexual nature conflict made with such energy and passion.
A: Sexual nature...?
L: Of course. The dynamic between Fini and Berlusconi is clearly erotic, that’s obvious.
A: Can you explain why?
L: Yes. You see, if you carefully observe the words and especially the expressions, gestures and non-verbal of the two, you will notice all the classic elements of a quarrel between lovers. In this case, we have a classical rebellion of a subdued subject (Fini) to the dominant one (Berlusconi).
A: Are you saying that between the two there is a sadomasochistic relationship?!
L: I did not say this, don’t label it. Usually marital relationships are also based on power relationships and the balance may vary over time and completely reverse its symmetry.
A: So does Fini want to overturn the symmetry?
L: We can put it that way. Or that he no longer accepts the role of submissive. It obviously undermines the dominant player, as the others.
A: The others…?
L: Of course, the other submissive subjects. Often a dominant personality, with a particular power, attracts many submissive people around him. It’s logic that if one of them rebels and wants to reverse the balance, others attack him and stand in defence of their master.
A: It sounds like what it’s happening…
L: That’s similar to what may happen in a harem with more wives and one decides to challenge the husband authority. The other women wouldn’t like it, because the liberation of rebel would be evidence of their enslavement.
A: I see. How do you think this crisis will evolve?
L: Continuing with the harem metaphor, insurgent woman have to leave her husband. Otherwise, she would seem really inconsistent…

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Thursday, April 22, 2010

April 25 Italy Liberation Day: what song to sing?

Stories and News No. 156

Next Sunday in Italy we’ll celebrate our Liberation Day, anniversary of the partisans war’s end.
A war requires factions, contenders, at least two.
Nevertheless, it would mean that there is someone who fights with himself.
Yesterday and today many newspapers told about the decision by Lega Nord mayor of Mogliano Veneto, a town in the province of Treviso, to replace the song Bella ciao with La canzone del Piave, as soundtrack of the local official celebration event.
Immediate and opponent replies, especially from the National Association of Partisans of Italy and the Democratic Party, arrived.
That’s the umpteenth conflict.
Two sides, two songs, two Italys fighting…

The Story:

Once upon a time there was a country.
In the country there were only two people: Homeland and Resistance.
Both were born on April 25, 1945.
Each of the two would have turned 65 in 2010.
The two men, now elderly, were completely different.
Probably the only thing they had in common was the day of their birthday and being the only citizens of the country they were obliged to celebrate it together.
Nevertheless, how could we celebrate something ourselves?
However, every year, exactly on the eve of April 25, the tension among them jumped to the stars.
Anyway, in the rest of the time they were ever on a dispute, but one thing is bickering on a normal day and it’s completely different when it’s your birthday.
On that day every difference, every aspect of their character that led them to conflict, was highlighted, bringing the contest to its highest level.
So, any excuse for a clash was welcomed by both.
In 2010, the disagreement explodes deciding what song to sing during the celebration, besides the usual Happy birthday tune.
Homeland proposed to replace the traditional Bella ciao, preferred by Resistance, with La canzone del Piave.
The discussion became hot and they failed to reach an agreement.
So, on April 25, at the propitious moment, both took all the breath in their throat and began unison to sing their hymns:
Homeland: “Il Piave mormorava calmo e placido al passaggio dei primi fanti il ventiquattro maggio; l'esercito marciava per raggiunger la frontiera per far contro il nemico una barriera! Muti passaron quella notte i fanti, tacere bisognava andare avanti. S'udiva intanto dalle amate sponde sommesso e lieve il tripudiar de l'onde. Era un presagio dolce e lusinghiero. Il Piave mormorò: Non passa lo straniero!
Resistance: “Una mattina mi son svegliato, o bella, ciao! bella, ciao! bella, ciao, ciao, ciao!
Una mattina mi son svegliato e ho trovato l'invasor. O partigiano, portami via, o bella, ciao! bella, ciao! bella, ciao, ciao, ciao! O partigiano, portami via, ché mi sento di morir.
Homeland: “Ma in una notte triste si parlò di un fosco evento e il Piave udiva l'ira e lo sgomento. Ahi, quanta gente ha visto venir giù, lasciare il tetto, poiché il nemico irruppe a Caporetto. Profughi ovunque dai lontani monti, venivano a gremir tutti i tuoi ponti. S'udiva allor dalle violate sponde sommesso e triste il mormorio de l'onde. Come un singhiozzo in quell'autunno nero. Il Piave mormorò: Ritorna lo straniero!
Resistance: “E se io muoio da partigiano, o bella, ciao! bella, ciao! bella, ciao, ciao, ciao!
E se io muoio da partigiano, tu mi devi seppellir. E seppellire lassù in montagna, o bella, ciao! bella, ciao! bella, ciao, ciao, ciao! E seppellire lassù in montagna sotto l'ombra di un bel fior.
Homeland: “E ritornò il nemico per l'orgoglio e per la fame voleva sfogar tutte le sue brame, vedeva il piano aprico di lassù: voleva ancora sfamarsi e tripudiare come allora!
No, disse il Piave, no, dissero i fanti, mai più il nemico faccia un passo avanti!
Si vide il Piave rigonfiar le sponde e come i fanti combattevan l'onde. Rosso del sangue del nemico altero, il Piave comandò: Indietro va', straniero!
Resistance: “E le genti che passeranno o bella, ciao! bella, ciao! bella, ciao, ciao, ciao!
E le genti che passeranno mi diranno che bel fior! È questo il fiore del partigiano, o bella, ciao! bella, ciao! bella, ciao, ciao, ciao!È questo il fiore del partigiano morto per la libertà!
Homeland: “Indietreggiò il nemico fino a Trieste fino a Trento e la Vittoria sciolse l'ali al vento! Fu sacro il patto antico, tra le schiere furon visti risorgere Oberdan, Sauro e Battisti! Infranse alfin l'italico valore le forze e l'armi dell'impiccatore! Sicure l'Alpi, libere le sponde, e tacque il Piave, si placaron l'onde. Sul patrio suol vinti i torvi Imperi, la Pace non trovò né oppressi, né stranieri!

At the end, they were both exhausted and voiceless.
Both began to cough and collapsed with pain in the throat as in the chest.
This is the story of a strange country, a country with only two inhabitants: Homeland and Resistance.
They were two men in war.
As you all know, a war provides factions, contenders, at least two.
Nevertheless, it would mean that there is someone who clashes with himself.
In both cases, if there is still a struggle, it means that war isn’t over...

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Fini vs Berlusconi is the real opposition

Stories and News No. 155

Soon we’ll feel hot!
That’s I loved to say to my high school classmate when the math teacher arrived on the day of schoolwork.
The temperature is already skyrocketing in Berlusconi’s PdL.
The dissenting groups led by President of Italian Chamber of Deputies Gianfranco Fini (co-founder of PdL) have got their signatures - about 50 – and so the former allies – about 75 - faithful to Silvio.
Tomorrow, at the official meeting of the PdL, we’ll see the first face to face confrontation between the different factions in the Italian government coalition, which are essentially two: one supports Fini and the other is with Berlusconi.
My question is this: how do centre-right people react to this dispute?

The Story:

Rachele has become eighty last week, but she still seems to be very smart.
His eyes are minimized, while the hearing is still working great.
She didn’t miss anything, because what comes to his ears is his only contact with the world.
That world is divided between the always on TV and his grandson Glauco.
He came to stay with her to attend university in Rome.
She agreed with joy when her daughter phoned to ask to host him, because then she felt very lonely.
However, the young, as polite and respectful, is always out and when he’s at home ever talks with his cell phone.
Rachele and Glauco are PdL voters.
The former has always been a Right elector, since her childhood, while his nephew is only a couple of years that votes.
He mainly votes Berlusconi.
Now they are both sitting on the couch with the television on.
When he’s there, Glauco has always the remote control and grandmother agrees, because for the rest of the time it’s in her hands.
Suddenly the cell phone asks Glauco’s attention and he leaves the room, as he usually does.
He knew that Rachele has two very developed ears and wants to protect his privacy.
The grandmother, taking advantage of his nephew’s absence, changes channel and zaps. After a few minutes she focuses on TV news and immediately captures the words of the conductor, though not from the beginning: "I'm not going to remove the trouble or to shut up, the political leader* said. I hope that Berlusconi will accept the dissent. Then added: A minimum of dignity was necessary... It’s time we look in the mirror and take risks. The follow announcement is clear: now we’ll start a new phase, in which those who have more yarn to weave will begin to weave. And so this solemn declaration: If a man has not willing to fight for his ideas or his ideas are not good or he’s worthless."
Just at that moment her grandson found his place on the sofa again, takes possession of the remote control and returns to the serial film which never loses.
At that moment, Rachele makes this comment: "It seems that Democratic Party has finally found a leader with the balls…"
"What are you talking about, Grandma?" Glauco asks.
"Well, you would understand if you had heard Democratic leader Pierluigi Bersani’s words at the TV news. I can’t believe he’s him…"

*Gianfranco Fini

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Volcano Iceland eruption is communist, Berlusconi said

Stories and News No. 154

In Iceland there is a volcano called Eyjafjöll, word that means Mountain of the islands. It lies within the glacier Eyjafjallajökull, whose name is often attributed to the volcano. On 20 March the fourth eruption in its history occurred and it’s still active, causing the spread in the air of a giant cloud made of ash that are causing great disorder in flights traffic and airports across Europe.
The same happens in Italy too.
Every country is trying to better manage the event and each government, according to its own style and way of dealing with relevant issues, differently react.
Someone told me that Prime Minister Berlusconi said: "This volcanic cloud that prevents business men from flying was created by the reactionary and lazy communist Left."
The important thing is not whether he seriously did it or not, because since he is on the road he said even worse things.
What matters are the reactions to his words…

The Story:

Gianfranco Fini, President of the Italian Chamber od Deputies and PdL co-leader, also  more or less unintentional leader of the opposition: "I don’t share this disrespectful of volcanic clouds language, but I have an institutional role, so I can’t be part of these dialectical fights…"

Pierluigi Bersani, Chairman of the Italian Democratic Party, only man alive who was able to get fewer votes than Dario Franceschini, so soon after his bad leadership: "The premier made defamatory accusations. We have nothing to do with the volcanic cloud, because the Democratic Party could never create so much anxiety among the population…"

Umberto Bossi, Northern League leader, rediscovered friend of the Prime Minister: "Berlusconi is wrong. The cloud is made by the Kebab smoke of Islamic terrorists who want to invade our green plains…"

Antonio Di Pietro, the Right-wing politician elected by the Centre people fled from the Left: "The Italian Premier would better do to stand on his trials instead of hiding inside a cloud…"

Pier Ferdinando Casini, the Christian all seasons ally: "If what Silvio told is true, we dissociate ourselves from the Democratic Party and justicialist Di Pietro…"

Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, Vatican State secretary, but also the man that when the teacher explained what to count to ten before speaking means had gone to the bathroom (I don’t say here to do what…): "The cloud is God's punishment on the heads of homosexuals that led paedophilia to our white church…"

Augusto Minzolini, the personified proof that in Italy anyone can become a national TV News director: "Tonight at Tg1 will have one of our volcanoes expert demonstrating the Bolshevik origins of the Icelandic ashes…"

Ignazio La Russa, Italian Minister of Defence, personified proof that in Italy really anyone can become a minister: "Italy will do its part as usual and will send army troops in Iceland. Obviously it is necessary to allocate more billions…"

And finally him, the Volcano: "What’s your problem? Can I quietly smoke a reefer?!"

And again with other wise comments…

The News: Save the Mine-sphere (Writer Stefano Benni's article).

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Monday, April 19, 2010

Emergency: I want to free everyone, including Afghans

Stories and News No. 153

Liberi subito (Immediately Free): this was one of the slogans that have accompanied the movement of protest to the Afghan authorities for the release of the Emergency volunteers, which - I repeat once again - have been for several days unjustly seized by the secret services.
The three Italian doctors have been released, officially with no charges against them.
They are innocent.
Until otherwise proven, even the six Afghan operators arrested are not guilty.
According to some newspapers one of them is still a prisoner.
For this reason, for me the story is not yet closed, because the presumption of innocence applies to all of us.
So, my slogan now is all immediately free

The Story:

All immediately free.
Because if I believe kidnapping a person infringing his human rights is a crime, my outrage is here whatever their nationality is.

I want to free all jailed workers.
Because I support Emergency means I support those who work with Emergency, even when the square is empty and no one asks me to sign a petition.

I demand free also Afghan operators.
Because without them, Emergency, like any NGO that is committed in the world, would not be able to fully achieve its missions.

I claim for them the same attention we gave to our countrymen.
Because it would be the demonstration it has never been just a personal matter, but also ideal.

I want to see all the local collaborators of Emergency returned to their families.
Because the suffering of the latter deserves too my involvement, my sympathy and my commitment.

I hope that those who went to the streets, or have just declared their commitment to the call by Emergency leader Gino Strada, don’t think that the war is over.
It will be over only when there will be peace for all…

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Friday, April 16, 2010

He is with Berlusconi She with Fini: couple divorce

Stories and News No. 152

The presumed - until official confirmation arrives - dispute between Prime Minister Berlusconi and President of the Chamber Gianfranco Fini, the main founders of the People of Freedom, is on the front pages of every newspaper.
It’s not the first and certainly not the last one.
The divisions are a feature of our politics, since I can remember.
Someone said that it’s the conflict that gives true meaning to a story.
If there isn’t conflict, we have no story, no narrative, there is no tale to follow and the show has no reason to go on air.
In this way the share dangerously falls, as well as advertising earnings.
You know, without money, almost everybody refuse to engage.
The confrontation, the controversy, the clash between the stars of parliament as those on reality shows or exclusively spoken sport TV channels, are essential to keep viewers glued to the screen.
That’s absolutely necessary; otherwise they might do something else.
As going out…

The Story:

Bianchi’s are a typical loyal to the People of Freedom family.
Carlo works for Berlusconi’s Mediolanum Bank.
He has always voted for Silvio, even before working for him, let alone later, when he joined the great team of the Italian premier.
His wife Maria is a lawyer, has a well busy office and is a daughter of art.
That’s logic: otherwise how could she have an office, well busy too?
She has ever been a convinced supporter of Gianfranco Fini but never entirely accept his decision to merge his party with Silvio’s one.
So, now that the most serious rift between the two leaders is open, the couple breaks.
It’s late evening, some hours after the restless lunch the two founders of the PDL had.
Carlo enters like mandrill in the bedroom: "Dear Maria..." he says coming near to her, brandishing the usual smile.
His wife, locked in her dressing gown, is standing in the room and freezes him with the following enigmatic words: "I announce that I am going to form an independent group."
It’s definitely one of the most original ways of history to end a relationship with the marital partner.
"Why, Maria? Wait..." the distressed husband replies, once understood the message of his wife. "Let’s spend the weekend... a pause for reflection to find a common solution..."
Actually this is not the first crisis between them, but every time Carlo has been able to patch.
This time it seems not working.
Maria begins to list all the problems which she have long denounced, first of all, the lightness shown recently by Carlo in making gifts to his not more secret lover, a prostitute, who’s supporter of Lega Nord party.
The latter, an insatiable nymphomaniac, has even declared that intends to fuck the whole bank of Carlo…
Maria has many things to say, literally opening the classic Pandora's box: "Not to mention your mother - the mother-in-law is a adorer to Berlusconi - that every day even accused me of being a traitor, if only I dare to ask to see another TV news than Rai Tg1 or Mediaset Tg4! Listen, I don’t want to waste my family and let and you and your whore to decide our lives. You made me outcast. I am not consulted on important decisions, you made me lose weight…"
"But if you fatten..."
"It's a metaphor, idiot! Look, if the only way to get things is to do like her, I’m ready…"
"Do you want become a whore?!"
"No, stupid! I mean that even those like me are able to masquerade in wolves!"
Carlo shows a very straight face, wondering how his wife could know the ultimate erotic game he played with his other lover.
However, he doesn’t give up and tries to calm the waters: "Dear Maria, don’t do this… the last year we got a lot of money… we had a huge hit... our family will travel faster and you... you're our engine!"
This statement sounds like another joke for Maria, since a few days earlier she found her husband at a dinner with the fiery lover and even her son - a fish-eye boy that many call the Trout. Once Maria saw his face has felt a bit better, knowing she’s not his mother.
"We cannot go ahead," Maria said with icy eyes.
However, Carlo has obtained a truce for 48 hours.
Nevertheless, the last words exchanged between the two before falling asleep were a whole program: "We had no quarrel," he murmured her by turning off the light, "it takes two to do it..."
"Yes..." Maria replied before going to sleep. "But divorce needs just one…"

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Thursday, April 15, 2010

Berlusconi writes letter to Karzai with Minister Frattini

Stories and News No. 151

Since five days, precisely since 4.30 p.m. (Afghanistan time zone) on Saturday 10 April, three Italian citizens are hostage to a foreign country.
I am talking about three people who have decided to risk their lives for their commitment to give free help to others.
For this reason, these persons should be the pride of a nation, to cite as a symbol of heroism to the younger generations, the best image in the world for a community.
Do you understand what Italy would gain from that? French, American, Chinese people, everybody hearing about Italy, soon would make this link: ah, that country of Emergency doctors, yes… what men they are!
Instead, to our misfortune, the association they make is with him...
Berlusconi’s response to the unacceptable afghan kidnapping - if you see, on this Blog things are called by their true name… - writes a heartfelt letter to President Karzai.
With the help of Foreign Affairs Minister Franco Frattini, somebody told me.
Here is the chronicle of the writing…

The Story:

Arcore, 2010, Berlusconi speaks and Frattini writes...

Berlusconi: "Blessed Karzai, how beautiful you are…"
Frattini: "Blessed Karzai, how much we like you!"
Berlusconi: "We're followers."
Frattini: "Sorry for the vulgarity…"
Berlusconi: "Possible vulgarity…"
Frattini: "What?"
Berlusconi: "Possible! Do you want to write what I say?"
Frattini: "Possible..."
Berlusconi: "Otherwise, he might say: why have you written sorry for the vulgarity if there are no one? Does it mean you wanted to be vulgar and did not succeed?"
Frattini: "Sorry for the vulgarity and full stop. How are you?"
Berlusconi: No, it's not good: just blessed."
Frattini: "Blessed."
Berlusconi: "Bravo, very blessed!"
Frattini: "Free Emergency doctors..."
Berlusconi: "No: could you leave Emergency doctors? If you can…"
Frattini: "Karzai!"
Berlusconi: "Karzai! What is this?"
Frattini: "Karzai! Let's calm down, in the sense of everybody."
Berlusconi: "Oh, oh!"
Frattini: "Let's calm down, oh!"
Berlusconi: "Put oh in parentheses."
Frattini: "Yeah…"
Berlusconi: "Then type: sorry for the parentheses."
Frattini: "Sorry for the parentheses."
Berlusconi: "Karzai! It seems that there no one can move… this and that and also you, oh!"
Frattini: "… this and that and also you, oh!"
Berlusconi: "We’re just two people… good small persons…"
Frattini: "We don’t hurt anybody..."
Berlusconi: "Neither a fly..."
Frattini: "Figure…!"
Berlusconi: "Figure..."
Frattini: "… Karzai!"
Berlusconi: "A saint like you!"
Frattini: "A guru..."
Berlusconi: "A holy man like you…"
Frattini: "You are worthier than a fly, aren’t you?"
Berlusconi: "No, delete! Don’t put him in a competition…"
Frattini: "Yeah!"
Berlusconi: "Now we need a good greeting, by humble sinners, okay? We salute you with..."
Frattini: "We salute you with..."
Berlusconi: "Write: we salute you with our face beneath your feet."
Frattini: "With our face..."
Berlusconi: "As sinners..."
Frattini: "…with our face beneath..."
Berlusconi: "Your feet, without even asking to stay still. You can move!"
Frattini: "What do you mean?"
Berlusconi: "So he thinks we are just two humble persons, do you understand? That’s a beautiful image!"
Frattini: "I agree!"
Berlusconi: "With our face under his feet. And he can move!"
Frattini: "And you can move as you please."
Berlusconi: "As you please"
Frattini: "And we keep quiet…"
Berlusconi: "Full stop. Kiss."
Frattini: "Sorry for the comparison with the fly..."
Berlusconi: "We didn’t want to offend you. Your humble sinners..."
Frattini: "Must we greet again?"
Berlusconi: "Yes, you know where our faces are."
Frattini: "Again?"
Berlusconi: "Write it!"
Frattini: "Always quiet."
Berlusconi: "Always quiet."
Frattini: "Under."

Freely inspired by this great movie.

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Berlusconi car is late: driver confesses

Stories and News No. 150

At the international meeting on nuclear safety, Silvio Berlusconi - our most prestigious international pride… - yesterday waited about 40 minutes the car that would have to bring him at the Willard Hotel, to digest the sumptuous dinner hosted by Obama to fellow Heads of State .
As usual, he must be recognized, many will say.
It’s impossible for him to not do it: if he cannot get the limelight for reasons that go beyond official duties, he’s not happy, many others will think.
However, this time the blame is not on him.
That is, it’s not directly, since the delay is all responsibility of the driver.
Before being substituted, he confessed his reasons…

The Story:

I’m guilty.
I am the person that was supposed to take the Italian premier.
The fact is that when I knew it was him… I refused.
The reason is simple: because I'm an honest citizen.
Because I pay taxes, even if the opposite is trendy.
Because I respect women, even when I don’t need them.
Because I also have skeletons in the closet, but I’m at any time ready to respond of them.
Because since I was born I never stopped believing that my country can be better than how I found it.
Because since I was born I never thought that this will happen easily.
Because when I look in the mirror I see a face that doesn’t need smiling to convince others of its sincerity.
Because my word is worthy and I thank those who reminds me when I forget.
Because I never made oaths on my children, even when I was perfectly sure that I will keep them, let alone reverse.
Because I don’t want to lose my job, but I’m tired of being ashamed of my country.
Because I'm tired of getting used to the worst… the worst… and the worst…
Because I'm tired of staying to watch the lives of the rich in a rearview mirror.
Because even an ordinary person like me can make a choice that may stop their run.
Because if the driver stops they will have to guide alone.
Because if I will remain at that steering wheel, I will be accountable too.
Because being part of the injustice machine is ever a crime, whether you sit in front and rear.
Because from now on, if I will help someone in his journey, I’ll want to be sure that his trip won’t cause suffering to anyone.
Because they can fire me for this, but nobody can take away the respect to me.
Because I'm an honest Italian citizen, although he and many others believe that I don’t exist...

Stories and news: “invented” Stories, fruit of my imagination, inspired by “true” media News.

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