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You are not on social networks?

Stories and News No. 1291

In recent years we have become increasingly hyper-connected, especially adolescents, who spend 8 to 10 hours a day on the internet, largely on social networks, with disastrous consequences for physical, mental and emotional health.
Hence the following likely dialogue inspired by a really recent event happened to me:

"You’re not on social networks?" A friend of mine, who I haven't seen for a while, asks me recently.
“No, I quit those things a few years ago,” I reply deliberately being ironic comparing theme to drugs, or something that cause a harmful form of addiction.
"For real?" He insists.
"Yes, really," I reply.
"And how can I put you in my Facebook group?"
"By simple logic, you can't, that's it."
"So you can't even add a like to my fan page?"
"No for the same reason."
"Understood. But can I always share a few posts, an image or a video with you?"
"You can still do it, but I don't necessarily have the right to see them, not being registered..."
"Yeah, that's right."
“What if I send to you a story on Instagram? I write some good ones, you know?"
"I don’t doubt it! But, you see, I just said before that I'm not on social networks. "
"Right. In the plural sense. "
“And how can I show you a clip on Tik Tok? You don't know the absurd and funny stuff that they share with me."
"You can't for the reasons above, but I would like to add that I am happy for you if you have found a pleasant way to live your time."
"Are you sarcastic?"
"No, I'm serious!"
"No social networks. Plural, then."
"That's right."
"What do we do with Twitch streams?"
"We don't in any way, I don't have it."
"Oh yes? So did you install it? Wait, I'll send you a link immediately..."
“Stop, you don’t understand. I meant yes, I don't have it."
"Of course."
"Plural, remember?"
"Yes, right."
“What about Twitter? Come on, I don't believe it. Everybody is there."
"Not everybody, here, and then I don't think I'm the only one."
“You are not on Twitter? But there it is different, the limit to the number of characters, the essential content, the quality of the synthesis, and the immediate sharing that..."
“I see and I don't deny it, what can I tell you? I'm sorry."
"About what?"
"Not to being there."
"In fact, it seemed strange to me."
"So, no social in the plural sense, literally?"
"Yeah, literally."
“Wait, are you kidding? I remember you liked to joke."
"Not at all, we haven't seen each other in a lifetime and the first thing I do it’s making fun of you?"
"Right… it would be weird."
"Well, in conclusion, you are not on social networks?"
I sigh, then I look at my old friend, watching him straight in the eye and with a faint hope in humanity I say: "No, but the good is that I am really here, now. Would you like to tell me about yourself?"

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